My mom was a troubled soul. She had low self esteem, which caused depression, which eventually turned into alcoholism, because back when she was depressed, people told you, "Just get over it" there wasn't medications for depression then, they didn't send you off to counselors for being "sad", (which is how family and friends looked at it. No they said, here have a drink it will make you feel better). Depression had a stigma attached to it then and in some ways it still does. But through it all my mom was a kind, sweet, loving person for the most part and she taught me many things. My parents divorced when I was little and when my dad remarried, my stepmom wanted him to get custody of me, but my dad said little girls belong with their moms.
Thank you dad. To me, even though things weren't like they should be, I'm glad that he left me with her, I think it helped shape me into the person I am today.
Anyway my mom taught me to be patient. We would be standing in the line at grocery store if I moved up to close to the person in front of me she'd say,
"Right now, it's their turn, don't crowd them, just be patient and your turn will come."
She taught me to never say anything bad about people. I can guess that most of you have heard,
"If you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all"
"Treat everyone as you would like to be treated"
She also told me to never hate anyone, you might not like their ways, but you should never hate them.
My mom actually did have one person she hated, who it was, I don't recall, but every time that person came around she'd say,
"I'm sorry Lord, please forgive me, I can't help it, but I just hate him/her."
See I can't even remember if it was a guy or girl. I also have one of those people that has been in my life, you know the ones, the one that makes you cringe, with just the mention of the name, the one that sets off red flag warnings to stay away, and makes your skin crawl. grrr...
Being raised by my mom taught me to be kind and helpful, to care about others and to be respectful of their feelings. My mom did quit drinking 2 years before she passed away, It was like getting her back. I miss you mom, you taught me well.
What are some of the things your mother taught you? Things that you will carry throughout your life and pass down to your children?
Such a nice memory of your mother you have painted. My mom also suffered with depression, ultimately taking her own life. My brother did the same a year ago this March. If I learned nothing else, it is to be true to myself. To speak out if I need to, to get help if I need it and avoid all persons who, as you say, make my skin crawl. Good lessons. I live as best as I can, because she was unable to do it for herself.ReplyDelete
I'm so sorry Jeannie. Depression is a hard thing to deal with. And everyone deals with it in different ways. It's sad though that there is still a stigma towards it. My brother did drugs for 8 years to cope and 6 years after he had quit and he was clean, he passed away from congestive heart failure. He was 32. Sending hugs your way to stay strong.ReplyDelete
It's so wonderful to have a mom who was able to teach you good values. I have always admired my mom for her strength and determination. I'm glad you had that time with her even though there were difficulties.ReplyDelete